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Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Colon Blow

I apologize ahead of time for this post, but if you read this blog you already know I love toilet humour.

Do you remember the Colon Blow skit from SNL?



Well I think I've found the real thing.

A few weeks ago I picked up a box of Kellogg's new Fibre Plus cereal.



Personally, I am not a big cold cereal fan. I don't find them very satisfying (i.e. even if I eat half the box I'm starving again in an hour) and generally speaking, the ones that taste good, like the above, are full of sugar.

But Adam LOVES cereal - particularly the sweet ones - and who am I to tell him what to eat? Okay, I do tell him what to eat. But he only has cereal for breakfast a few days a week, opting for a healthier choice of oatmeal the other days.

Unfortunately, the girls love Adam's "Cookies in a bowl" as I have come to think of them. They took one look at the new cereal box and had to try some.

They opened the box last Monday and devoured it by Friday. Adam didn't even get to taste any. Last week the two of them simply ate bowl after bowl of Fibre Plus for breakfast every morning.

Although it pains me to see them consume so much sugar, it made them so happy that I actually got to eat my power porridge and read the paper in peace...well, relatively speaking anyways.

But things came to a head on Friday.

First, Big A's daycare teacher called me around 3pm to inform me that there had been 4 bathroom emergencies in the span of 30 minutes and did I know what was going on. All of a sudden it dawned on me that perhaps I shouldn't have let her eat so much of this high fibre cereal. Her teacher and I concluded that too much fibre was the culprit, and I vowed to exert more control over her cereal consumption in the future.

After picking up Big A - who decided she needed Adam to give her a bath ASAP, I took off to pick up Little A from her daycare. As soon as I got there I knew something was up because she was wearing her "extra" daycare clothes instead of the cute outfit I had put her in that morning. When I inquired, her teachers told me that she had blown her pants off earlier that day. Hmm, definitely too much fibre.

Moral of the story: if you need help evacuating, Fibre Plus is a tasty way to do it. Just be prepared for the outcome!