This week has been filled with excitement, fear, disappointments, frustrations and joy. So pretty much just like any other week, right?
I have had counselling sessions that have been fascinating, educational, and satisfying, I have also had disappointments. Some clients at the fertility clinic refuse to have a student intern (me) present during sessions, and my first solo client at the general clinic was a no-show yesterday.
Little A started the week with a seriously high fever and then severe diarrhea from the antibiotics she is on. She bounced back to her usual self pretty quick, but Big A has regressed over the past few weeks. She is acting very jealous of Little A again and has been sullen, defiant, disrespectful and emotional with Adam and I. We remain completely in the dark about what may be causing this latest phase of misbehaviour.
Overall I continue to have some moderate improvement in my leg pain, but it too, goes up and down. Sitting continues to be the central problem but I have also realized that I have to be very careful with the footwear I choose. On bad days I start getting really down and worry I will have to live with this chronic pain forever. Interestingly, two people recently told me that they know someone who is experiencing the same thing after having one or more c-sections. Hmm...
I am tired of having to sit on a yoga block everywhere I go and am frustrated that the only footwear I can now wear are my ugly black Sketchers. This is particularly frustrating in light of the fact that S.D. gently mentioned that the fertility clinic has a dress code I better adhere to of conservative, business caual. She wears skirts and pumps, but there is no way I can wear pumps right now. Actually, I have never been able to wear them regularly. But no yoga pants, jeans or Sketchers on days when I am at the clinic.
My annual Mother's Day shopping spree that Adam treats me to is coming right on time. I'm going to have to find some comfortable/respectable clothes!
I am really hoping my MRIs reveal something that explains my pain and something that can be fixed...preferrably without surgery!!
My grandma Ruth seems to have stabalized but it doesn't look like she will be getting any better. I am most likely going to go down to New York in the next few weeks or months to see her. I love going to NYC more than any other place on the planet, but this will not be a happy visit.
I am just crossing my fingers that Adam and I make it out to San Francisco trip in 2 weeks that we have been looking forward to for so long. Right now I could really, really use a break!