Healthy Life Lessons

Sherma started babysitting Little A this week and it's going great. As long as she doesn't see me (I usually hide in our bedroom to do my school work), she is perfectly happy to hang out with Sherma. But I don't understand why I suddenly feel like I have LESS time. The days are just flying by and I feel like I can never get as much work done as I would like. My new course called Psychological Assessment is not as interesting, so far, as Theories of Personality was. It's very technical and methodological. This one has weekly assignments plus three additional papers. It always seems completely overwhelming at the beginning. Of course, it doesn't help that I have scheduled a million appointments for the next few weeks. Now that I have Sherma I can finally do things like go to the dentist! Adam and I are also exhausted. Big A has woken us up repeatedly the past 2 nights. I don't know what's going on. Last night she just said she couldn't sleep an...

One thing that has been clear in my studies so far is the interconnectedness of the body and the mind. In my first course on human development, all the research we did demonstrated how virtually everything about us, including our personalities and physical and mental health, is determined by the interaction between biology and the environment. I am not a hypochondriac, but I have always been terrified of getting cancer. This is probably because there is a strong history of cancer in my family, but also because most cancers don't seem to be all that preventable. In other words, we have little control of whether we get them...and that is terrifying to me! Things like heart disease, assuming you don't have a strong genetic predisposition, can be avoided through lifestyle factors, so it is something I rarely worry about. We have no family history and I probably exercise more, and eat a healthier diet, than most North Americans. Adam's big worry has always been Alzheimer...

I did a yoga class today at a neighbourhood studio. It was the first class I've done in about 3 years. Even though it wasn't the best class ever (the teacher wasn't all that experienced), it was wonderful to have an hour to myself and it reminded me how much I love yoga. I used to do yoga once a week religiously for years. I started doing ashtanga (power yoga) because I was young and stupid and thought that an activity wasn't worthwhile unless it burned calories. But eventually I got tired of it and found I really wanted more of a restorative experience, especially since I already do so much cardio and high intensity exercise. I also got sick of the competitive attitude I was finding in some power yoga classes. I'm definitely not extraordinarily flexible and never really got to a super advanced level in yoga. I once accidently showed up to an advanced class at my old yoga studio and I was not made to feel welcome. So anyways, I switched to hatha yoga, a muc...

So I'm working on making piece with my family's eating habits (hard right now since Little A has decided she pretty much won't eat anything except watermelon and rice cakes now!)and trying to appreciate the fact that Big A will generally eat her veggies. Unfortunately, I feel like, aside from modelling a fairly healthy lifestyle, I'm failing her as a parent. In fact, I'm thinking when I finally have my counselling practice, I should put a disclaimer on my business cards and website stating that I help people having difficulties bringing a child into the world but that I can't help with difficulties of raising that child once he or she is here, because I have NO expertise in that area. With Little A turning one yesterday, Big A's jealousy has become overwhelming. And while I suppose that, as well as her resultant petulance, is normal 3 year old behaviour, the truth is, she has been an incredibly difficult child since she was 18 months old. But only for Ad...

The anxiety over what your children eat begins the day they are born. To breastfeed or not to breastfeed? I know so many women who chose not to breastfeed, or were not able to breastfeed and spend far too much time beating themselves up and feeling guilty about it. I feel very fortunate that I have been able to breastfeed both my girls, but whether it will really make a significant difference to their future health and well-being is debateable. Once your kids start eating solid foods, the stress and guilt only increases. I was so smug with Big A because I had her eating only organic, whole foods for the first year with absolutely NO added sugars or salt. I hand made everything. She ate squash, brown rice and white kidney bean casserole, mexican black bean, corn and brown rice casserole, organic chicken and sweet potatoes, brown rice pasta with tomato sauce and pureed veggies, organic spelt bread with organic apple butter, unsweetened organic yogurt, sugar-free organic spelt blue...

P1: I can't believe next week is my last week of mat leave. Little A will be one year old on April 22nd (Earth Day!). Actually, what I can't believe is that I survived this year. I think I had some degree of post-partum depression/anxiety for at least the first 6 months of her life. So it's kind of ironic that she is such a happy baby...much more low maintenance and easy going than Big A ever was. I'm glad at least that my misery didn't affect her. I am so excited to really begin focusing on my studies and career transition now. On April 28th I have a 3 hour volunteer orientation at Mount Sinai and I meet with Dr. M on May 14th...I so hope I can get started volunteering ASAP. I really think I can make a difference for women who have experienced a pregnancy loss, at least I hope I can. I know I could really have used the type of emotional support I will be offering when I went through my miscarriage. P2: There is nothing worse than whining. Anyone with a ch...

P1: I team taught the Brazilian Butt Lift class with the Group Ex director yesterday at the Toronto Athletic Club (TAC). Wow, this woman is like 38 weeks pregnant and she is still going strong. I feel like the fact that I taught spinning right up until a few days before having both girls is nothing compared to what she's been doing! The class definitely kicks your butt (mine's a bit sore today), so I'm going to have to come up with lots of different ways of challenging these enthusiastic folks. I am so excited to have a new class to teach! P2: I really don't get the preschool psyche. After being fairly well behaved the whole time Adam was away, it all fell apart with Big A at bedtime last night. She kept calling us back up to her room after we put her to bed and then would scream each time we left her. She ended up screaming until she fell asleep. I can only guess that she was overwrought with emotion about having daddy home finally and just doesn't know ho...

P1: So after submitting my first two papers for my Theories of Personality course, my professor emailed me to ask if I "Really had a PhD?". Excuse me? I told him that I absolutely did, that it was from the University of Toronto and I completed it in 2005. He apologized and explained that he had to ask because, (1)he's taught almost 7,000 students and I'm only the second PhD he's ever taught (thanks for rubbing in the fact that most people with a doctorate don't need to get another Masters degree to forward their career in the desired direction!), and (2) because if I don't actually have a PhD, it's unethical to say that I do. Duh? I was pretty insulted. What kind of person does he think I am? I would never misrepresent myself that way. In fact, from what I've learned in his course, only someone with a serious personality disorder would do such a thing! P2: On the other hand, I am surprised by how often as a parent you do have to lie to your...

I don't know how single parents survive, I really don't. Each time Adam tells me he has to go away for work, I am panic stricken. When he went away last October it was somewhat of a disaster. I was so stressed I didn't sleep the whole time he was away and hiring our neighbours' nanny to help me out with the girls in the evenings backfired. Big A seemed resentful of the intrusion and was incredibly rude to her. So far this time around, things have been better. I am trying to project the image of feeling in control to Big A because I think in the past part of the problem was she picked up on my anxiety. She's been behaving pretty well and hopefully this will continue until Adam gets back in a few days. I'm also making an effort to try and do some fun things, since I think she associates daddy with fun and me with routine (i.e. getting out the door in the morning, getting to daycare, getting home from daycare, etc.). Yesterday after I picked her up we went ...

In my Theories of Personality course we have been studying the concept of regression, which actually originates in Freudian psychoanalytic theory. I think a lot of Freudian theory is hogwash, but his work on defense mechanisms actually has some merit. Regression, or the return to a previous state of functioning, is one of the many defense mechanisms Freud believe that we use to protect our ego from external threats, or disturbing thoughts or situations. Regression is the one defense mechanism which usually occurs in children. We seem to be dealing with regression with Big A a lot lately. It has been a really tough weekend. She has been whining and acting up constantly. I think jealousy of Little A is growing more and more as Little A grows. Big A wants to be fed, she wants to be carried, she claims she doesn't know how to put on her shoes (although after we told her she would not get a new big girl bicycle for her birthday unless she started putting on her own shoes, she su...

I love breakfast. Not just because I love the food, but reading the newspaper and drinking coffee are so much more enjoyable first thing in the morning for some reason. But I do love the food. I love oatmeal and eat it every day. I used to eat cold cereal until grad school when I finally realized that I was lactose intolerant and my chronic stomach problems were due to the milk. Then I switched to hot cereal, made with water, and have not looked back since. I also find oatmeal much more satisfying. I can eat half a box of cold cereal and be hungry again in an hour. The only exception to my preference for oatmeal was during both my pregnancies. For some reason I developed an extreme aversion to oatmeal so I ate almond butter and toast and yogurt smoothies or a huge bowl of homemade muesli with fruit and yogurt when I was pregnant with Big A. When I was pregnant with Little A I started out doing the same as soon as my oatmeal aversion developed (by about 6 weeks), but then got...

We seem to have never ending rain this week and it is supposed to continue through the weekend until next week. Yuck! P1: The past few days I have been working on a Lunch and Learn seminar I will be giving to corporate clients of the fitness consulting company I got hired with. It's on fitess/health goal setting, fitness myths and back care. I've been teaching myself how to use all the fancy animation stuff in Powerpoint, and it's actually kind of fun. The seminar isn't until June so I have lots of time to tinker with it. P2: Little A is still so all over the place with her eating. One day is great, the next is terrible. I no longer worry, but more than anything, it is just frustrating because I can never predict what she will want, which means there is often lots of mess and wasted food. Tuesday at breakfast she refused her bread and almond butter and screamed when I gave her banana, yesterday she happy devoured both, today she refused both the bread and the ban...

I LOVE avocados. They are so delicious AND nutritious. Unfortunately both my girls hate them and even Adam is not a big fan. So I can't cook with them. Consequently, I often incorporate them into my lunches so I can enjoy them on my own. Like today, I had scrambled eggs and guacamole in a whole wheat pita. Yum! Sometimes I make a grilled chicken and guacamole sandwich, it's yummy too. Here is my recipe for guacamole: 1 ripe avocado, peeled, pitted and diced 4 roma tomatoes, cored, seeded and diced 2 garlic cloves, minced 1/2 or whole fresh or pickled jalapeno pepper, to taste (optional) Juice of 1 lime 2 tbls bottled salsa (optional) 1/2 tsp ground cumin Mash avocado to desired consistency (I like to leave it a bit chunky) and then add all the other ingredients. Enjoy!

11. Product packaging that requires dynamite to be removed 12. Cooking smells on my hair and/or clothing 13. Smell of chlorine on skin after swimming 14. People who smoke 15. Telemarketers 16. Loud motorcycle engines (one just went past my window) 17. When my children won't even TRY a new food 18. When I bite my tongue (did this in my sleep the other night!) 19. When an article I want for school is not available from the library or online and must be "purchased" 20. When my favorite t.v. shows are pre-empted...usually for some stupid sports event.

P1: I am happy to report I got 100% on my first quiz, and 95% on my first paper in my Theories of Personality course. I feel like the material is coming pretty naturally to me simply because I find it so interesting. I am getting more and more excited about my new career path. I really feel like this is the direction I was meant to be going in all along. That being said, I no longer wallow in regret that I spent so many years on the "wrong" path. I think if I had gone into counselling right after my BA, as I had originally planned, it would have been a disaster simply because I didn't have the maturity or life experience required. Or at least that's what I tell myself. P2: We have had another great weekend with the girls. Big A has been good, even though my parents were visiting - which sometimes stimulates some acting up due to a larger audience being present, and Little A has been good too, aside from some grumpiness yesterday which we finally figured out right befo...

P1: I finally have drafts completed of my last 2 papers for my course. I'm feeling pretty good about them but Adam is going to give me feedback on the long one today, so we'll see if I'm deluding myself by thinking it's impressive. P2: I had a bad start to the morning with Big A today. She started acting up seemingly out of knowhere and it escalated to a full-blown tantrum. Unfortunately, I didn't handle it well. I tried demanding an explanation from her about why she was misbehaving. The parenting experts tell you never to do this because little kids don't really know why they do the things they do. In hindsight, I think she simply wanted my attention and that's all it was. It began when I was upstairs in the bathroom getting ready and she was eating her cereal in the living room watching television by herself. Perhaps I am asking too much of her to sit by herself in the mornings. Later, once we had made up, she wanted hugs and to sit on my lap and for me t...