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Welcome to Fall!

Autumn is my absolute favorite time of year. I love the moderate weather, fresh smell in the air and the beautiful fall folliage. I love Thanksgiving and Halloween. I love the feeling of a new beginning - which, I know is the opposite of how most people view this season, but I hate, I mean absolutely despise summer, so the beginning of fall is a welcome time of year for me. Although September here can be just as steamy as August, this year the cooler weather has come early and I am blissfully happy. I can sleep with just a window open and no a/c and I can sit out on our back deck with a coffee in the morning doing my readings for school.

I am pleased to say that, so far, all of the transitions in our household seem to be going well. My course on counselling ethics is interesting, but not too demanding (weekly discussions, two assignments and an open-book exam) and I am not feeling the intense pressure to work like I did all spring and summer. I'm wondering if this is because I now have a quiet house to myself all day or because I cleared some things off my plate (no more corporate fitness seminars booked and no more Thursday afternoon Brazilian Butt Lift classes to teach). The interview I had booked for this week at the North JCC ended up being cancelled...They hired someone else for the position before even meeting me. I guess I shouldn't be quite as hurt as if this had occurred after they met me, but it's as bit weird. Adam suggested that they had someone in mind the whole time and were just booking other interviews in case they were not able to hire this individual. Who knows...but the reality is, that if my research project at Mount Sinai is approved, it will likely take over a bit part of my time so I wouldn't be able to take on such a position anyways. I just wish I could be bringing in some money right now...

Big A is doing great in school and her new daycare. I am so proud of her! She has adjusted so quickly and I think she will really flourish in her new environment. Little A has also surprised us with how well she has adjusted. Aside from when I leave her each morning and at pick-up time when she sees other parents coming to get their kids before I arrive at the end of the day, she is apparently happy and well-behaved. So it appears as if she is following in the foot steps of her older sister, so far, and is saving all of her bad behaviour for her parents. No temper tantrums, no throwing food, no biting, no scratching and no pushing the other kids. Unfortunately, when I come to get her, she acts out with me, which I believe is her way of expressing her anger at being abandoned. She flings her snacks out of the stroller on the way home and then when we get home she wants to nurse but insists on changing breasts every 2 minutes (I think this is her weird way of bossing me around). She also is back to throwing her food at suppertime, even if its her favorite food like scrambled eggs or meatballs.

Although it's challenging for Adam and I, I do prefer that the girls misbehave for us, rather than for other people. It just makes me wonder why they do so. Is it because they have such secure attachments with us and know our love is unconditional? Or is it because Adam and I are both have OCD/control-freak tendencies and they are reacting against this? Or is this aspect of their personalities simply biologically determined? I suspect all of these things may be factors.

Tomorrow, September 11th, is my 36th birthday. I don't really feel bothered by that. I'll admit I still think of myself as somewhere around 28 and have to remind myself when I am with people in that age range, that I am not, in fact, still in my 20s. Actually, the fact that my older brother turned 40 a few days ago seems weirder. I have a brother who's 40! My parents have a child who's 40! It still blows my mind that each of us have 2 kids now and my parents have 4 grandchildren. When did we all grow up? Have we grown up? Some days I'm not so sure.

I am excited for my cocktail party tomorrow and the opportunity to see some of my friends sans children. Unfortunately, many were unable to get babysitters and thus are not going to be able to make it. Oh well, that's how it goes. My in-laws are taking the girls all day tomorrow so we can prepare for the event. There is lots to do, but it is going to be lots of fun.

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